Ollie Bollie
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AVENGERS ASSEMBLE: A Review of sorts
All fans will know that this beast of a feature has been riding on 5 years of hype and speculation. Did it live up to the hype?
Well in a word, yes. Yes it bloody did with flying colours to be precise.
Inevitably one who writes their own blog on the internet is likely to be a bit nerdy, and thus probably a comic book/movie fan. To watch this film analytically was a big challenge, not because I didn’t know how, but exactly the opposite in-fact. I didn’t want to criticise it. It’s a difficult position but you just remind yourself, sometimes you go to the cinema just to have fun and enjoy yourself so I loosened the reigns of my film critique perspective and sank into the explosive mind-blowing fun that was Avengers Assemble.
I’ll talk about the bad first, because then I can get it out of the way. One challenge with this film, perhaps the main challenge was to integrate this ensemble cast without the movie collapsing under it’s own weight. I guess Marvel did the intelligent thing by introducing sub-characters such as Agent Coulson, Nick Fury, Black Widow and Hawkeye in previous films, even if it was just a short cameo to tell the audience that they did in fact exist in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. However, my main problem with this film, was Hawkeye. Do not misunderstand me here, Jeremy Renner did a magnificent job with the character in the screen time he was given but that was the main problem. In my eyes, Hawkeye didn’t get enough screen time. Another problem I noticed was the length. From my fan perspective I would want the film to go on for 3824398567 years. Or thereabouts. However I think they could have shaved about 20 minutes off or at least that twenty minutes could have included more of Hawkeye maybe.That’s all the bad out of the way. Which in fairness for a $220 million 2 hour 20 minute blockbuster is really good going. The main man to thank? Joss Whedon. Hats off to the cast, they did a magnificent job and didn’t forget their characters and how they tick but only Whedon could have directed and written such an intricately balanced and healthy film. Although the storyline is essentially basic, it does not deter the film’s ability to be interesting. Infact, if the plot tried to be sophisticated and vastly layered then it would have destroyed the interest. The main reason most people will want to see this is to see Iron Man and Thor in the same scene beating each other senseless (by the way, that does happen. It’s very cool). Joss Whedon delivers what the fans want, but does it intelligently. Not like a brainless moron (Michael Bay). Whedon is a comic book fan himself and that was a gratifying trait for the film because it means he cares about the characters. The best scenes in the film for me were not necessarily the mammoth action sequences, but infact watching all these magnificent characters interact in the same room. The dialogue is banterful as much as it is meaningful which is good for a film that is self-aware at what it’s showing the audience. Which leads me onto some great comedic moments. Some scenes with Captain America coming to grips with present day technology offer some chuckle worthy moments. The villain of the film, Loki (Tom Hiddleston) is done to a tee. Infact I’d go as far as to say that Avengers Assemble is Loki’s film and the other characters cameo. Hiddleston brings more depth into his character despite being well established from Thor (2011). Plus, he is just, full blown evil. A scene from between Loki and Black Widow on the Shield heli-carrier demonstrates this with slight resemblance to Silence of The Lambs.
Who is the best character?
It was a tricky decision, but I have to say it.
The Incredible Hulk.For once this character was brought into the film format excellently. The problem with the Hulk is that he is a great character to see on the page but is so difficult to translate on to the big screen. With excellent illustrations that capture the Hulk’s rage, you can tell that Banner is fuming with uncontrollable rage which is actually quite terrifying. The Hulk should be terrifying. The problem with the previous film The Incredible Hulk (2008) is that as soon as Bruce Banner transformed into the Hulk, I didn’t believe it. I just saw a CGI Motion-captured creature that was made on a laptop that resembled nothing more than angry Shrek. Avengers Assemble presented both sides of this character excellently. Mark Ruffalo revealed himself as a brilliant humble and dry-humoured Bruce Banner and what I noticed that the Motion-capture they used was actually from Mark Ruffalo himself, and the Hulk actually looks like him facially. This helped link the big green alter ego to Banner better. Plus, he is actually scary. Especially in the scene when he first transforms into the Hulk. The threat is there. The Hulk for me definitely stole the show with some breathtaking action moments with many laugh-out-loud parts too. The comedy is great. It’s there to stop us thinking this film is taking itself too seriously, which is admirable because the material they have in the flick would score anybody major bragging rights.
Avengers Assemble works.
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Come sit in my chair and tell me all about it.
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The Next Best You. (exercise)
Imagine a world where being clinically obese was considered the normal figure that everybody wanted. Well sugar, put down your cheeseburger and listen closely. Getting fat is roughly 3/4 easier than losing weight and gaining muscle for what people would consider a great figure. This is an average although metabolisms of individuals vary massively, the general idea is yeah, exercise can be difficult yet all it requires is a routine and a good start. Basically driving, but driving to eradicate those stubborn fatty globules from that sexy body honey.
It’s always great to see a visible difference when your figure changes but the problem is for you, that it happens gradually so therefore you will never fully notice a radical change. An experiment was done where a frog was thrown into a pan of boiling water, it’s reaction. It immediately jumped out. However, the experiment was repeated, the frog placed in the water which was then gradually brought to the boil, it’s reaction. Nothing. It stayed there and died. The change in temperature was so gradual that it did not trigger sudden realisation. This epiphanic moment that happens in our brains can be shorted out by gradual introduction.
My point being, if you have been working on getting the perfect body for quite a while, you might not realise that your ideal figure you wanted to achieve has truly been achieved but as humans like to have the next best thing, you will probably never recognise the appropriate time to stop. Quite right too, because with anything (including exercise), to persist at perfection allows maintenance of a high standard of which to work from.
Moral of the story.
Life changes dramatically the longer you give it.
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For those who like robots and spacemen.
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Living in tame old Dorset
Nothing actually happens that often in Dorset. It sometimes has social events but if you aren’t there then you could assume it doesn’t exist.
There is no impact. Although I wouldn’t imagine trying to describe how Dorset should change because that will never happen. I guess that is why people move away which is obvious given how such an annoying fuck I am that I don’t suit Dorset. At all. I appreciate it for it’s laid back approach and it’s acceptance of status to the rest of the country as the ‘escape’ county. However like any holiday destination, if you’re there too long it’ll lose its charm. Plus a holiday in Dorset is a gamble considering the boring weather we get most of the time.
The coast is good. If country air would be defined by a particular smell, I’d rather it be the clear breeze on Studland bay instead of a field that has a slight odour of cow shit. A lot of people think Dorset is heavily, a farm county. Devon actually makes up for almost a third of UK farming which is a hefty amount. They also have many holiday farm cottages which goes to show how many buildings they have going spare. Dorset is more on the cusp. It’s a mix of agriculture, tourism and industrialism. We don’t really have a lot of innovation or expansion of urban environments swallowing our fields. All our major towns like Bournemouth seem very self-contained. In a way, it is nice. Personally, to watch a field to get churned up to make way for a bypass is a shame because fields are nice to walk in minus the malicious farmer with a shotgun, but you’d find that more in Devon.
To get away from Dorset would satisfy one persons needs, and squander another. The environment of London, Paris and NYC have been something I like because of their buzz. Although, in the end, home is home, and my home is Dorset. Except none of use really have that accent. (I speak standard Estuarine English like most of us)
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Another snazzy poster, ey?
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Snazzy poster, ey?
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SPACE MAN FILM.
That little film I’ve been talking about every so often. We finished it and you can watch it now. Yay!
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Making a film…
…is bloody difficult.
Nah only joking, it’s well easy really. You just need loads of money and a good idea. That isn’t even true either. There is so many factors I have learnt which contribute to a production. It is daunting to think of all the aspects but then again, you can flip that around and say it’s all about the experience. The more you know about all the key components, the better you will utilise them in the future.
This is a post to primarily talk about the newest short film me and the team have been working on. ‘Solitude’
It began when I had a discussion with Martin (blonde friend who knows how to play cello very well) about creating a science fiction film set in space. The appeal of the conversation was for us to cast Robin (camera man and pipe enthusiast) as this ‘space man’ because it was something we hadn’t done yet. Plus we had all seen our fair share of science fiction throughout childhood so it was definitely a genre that was mutually enjoyed. Without telling anyone, because I’m a loser, I built a boxy looking robot called N.O.A as I had already formulated a basic idea as to what this Sci-fi film would entail. Then our return to school came and I was asked to produce an independent unit of coursework of anything I chose. I saved myself a little trouble by doing the film as an Art piece for my school work and as our next big project with the gang. Oh and the gang as it were, is Simple Studios. A name I coined in 2005 back when HD meant ‘format of the Gods’ and DSLR’s were all very expensive. We consist of 4 people mainly. A director (Me) A camera man (Robin) Actors (Martin, John and Myself) but acting roles would be offered to anybody we knew that was suitable and up for it too. One problem occurred which was the roles that were given. My experience with using the camera is, modestly, acceptable. However Robin’s ability to monitor and operate movement, focus-pulling, zoom and exposure simultaneously was something I could not learn in just a month. Robin finally decided that the lead role of the space man should be left to me. We essentially switched roles but saw it as a wise decision. Admittedly, looking back on that decision, I know I’d rather prefer experimenting with roles when the film isn’t being marked as an A2 art unit. Just to be on the safe side. As a personal art project, many responsibilities were for me to handle such as clearing out the rooms in my house to convert into the underground planetary mining base, find and/or build props, research, and mostly revising my character. I remember when the set was finished being dressed, I just stayed there for about 2 hours on my own, in complete solitary confinement. I thought to myself “If I had to live in this place for 1000 days on my own with just a robot, what would I do?” That time spent alone in the set definitely helped bring the final piece of the puzzle together with the creation of my character. Also I felt familiar with the set anyway because I built it. During filming, it was cold in the set (because of no heating and it was winter) which was always a bit of a distraction for us to get into filming mode, furthermore the inexperience of filming in a 360’ set gave us a few challenges we hadn’t encountered before. Nevertheless, we soldiered on, and in the end the filming was completed. Filming outside was difficult due to the stickiness of the clay. But we still filmed the scenes.
That is something I will always appreciate. When we’re filming, we never encounter problems between us that hinder productions or the quality of them either. It’s always external problems like the weather or availability. As a unit, we’re not too shabby. Not too shabby, at all.
I enjoyed being a spaceman, I loved working with the gang again and hopefully they enjoyed it too. If you want to watch the finished item then check out our page at:
What can be the next big idea? there is some ideas in the pipeline but I shan’t say, because apparently it’s snowing outside. BYE.
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2012 is here, smelling like liberty, and cheese.
Christmas has been and gone, we’re all basically fat now from festive food and if you’re not, you’re doing it wrong.
First topic that I can think of about an approaching new year, is drinking excessively and dressing up like a fool. Fancy dress and Alcohol. The two worst mixtures man could ever combine. Like strawberries, and mayonnaise. Or wedding dresses, and a blustery day. Oh and kissing people, that’s fun but can also be the worst scenario ever when there’s nobody there. Then you look like the twat in the middle of party, dressed up as a hotdog or a tiger standing alone in the middle of a celebratory smooch fest. You’re not the tiger, you’re the cowardly lion. A cowardly lion with his tail between his legs with a bad start to the new year. How tragic. Shut up. It’s the new year, and you should revel being surrounded by everybody having a good time. You should have a good time too. Obviously I’d like to point out I have no experience of this situation, I’m not a saddo. Whereas, you are. Because you’re reading this and you must be a saddo if you’re reading my bloggity blog blog. Humour, sympathy and insults. I apologise, my writing is never meant to insult anyone, not a good way to interest the reader. Moving on, the next thing an approaching new year can bring, is lots of left over cheese. It’s just there in your fridge from where your family has been over unless you’ve spent Christmas somewhere else in which case they have a fridge full of left over cheese providing they didn’t give you a picnic hamper to distribute all the fucking cheese left over. I don’t understand. Cheese isn’t really a Christmassy festive food. You’d have cheese and biscuits whenever, or cheese in a sandwich. There’s always something weird about someone eating a mince pie when it isn’t near the Christmas season, but cheese is there for any occasion. Like the guy who didn’t bother dressing up on new years. He’ll wear those clothes anytime of the year so why are they so special now. Costumes are like mince pies and normal clothes are like cheese. That’s all I’m saying. It is a new year though which gets people in this weird mood where they go all serious and stuff, by deciding to make something change in their life. But lets be honest, nothing truly dramatic happens in your life unless it’s out of your control. But! the new year for us all does not mean a reminder of failed resolutions and how fat we’ve gotten over the Christmas season. I for example, finish Sixth Form and will be travelling. Also partaking in work experience at various film studios which will be great, although I am aware that this period of freedom before Uni won’t last. That doesn’t matter. When you’re having fun, you always live in the now, otherwise you won’t enjoy it.
I must apologise for the balderdash and piffle I’ve spluttered on to the last half of this post but it’s the new year so it’s a new beginning. And my new year will have less cheese in it thank you. Although probably not, I like cheese.
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Christmas is on it’s way.
So yeah, it’s the first of December, people have opened the first door on their calendar and planned their Christmas shopping. Aahhhhh….
Whether you’re excited or a Scrooge when it comes to the holiday season, nothing will stop you from being bombarded by the commercialism of Christmas nowadays. However, study of society nowadays shows that we take little or no interest in anything unless it is of consumer value. Meaning, if everyone wants it, and has to pay to get it, then they will think they love it. Obviously back in the olden days, Christmas was seen as a very religious and comforting time of year. This religiosity is still at the core of the holiday yet many people have forgotten it through generations, and it is becoming more vague the more generations go by. Now I could definitely blah blah blah about secularisation in modern society but I’ll save that for my Sociology revision. My view on Christmas is that in essence, it is about getting the family under one roof and as you get older you do begin to realise that in some families, that can be a rarity. Yet with the advertisements on the television and internet, as well as the decor of our homes and streets that light up our evenings with a nice big electricity bill thankfully sorted by the tax-payers, oh joy, helps to show a more visual spectacle of the Christmas season.
So whether you think commercialisation of the Christmas season is a hideous mutation from what it used to symbolise, or a way to boost people’s morale on the holiday, you can always rely on the presence of others to light up your heart more than those ridiculously expensive lights you just decorated your tree with.
Moral of the story.
Christmas is expensive, smile and accept it. -
How to be a Gentleman.
Always meet your date at the door.
Don’t spit on the pavement.
Take her picture.
Write her letters. On paper.
Never turn down a girl’s invitation to dance.
Always ask her to dance. Don’t make her ask you.
Every hat should serve a purpose. That purpose ceases when you step inside.
Know the proper time to chew gum. It’s less often than you think.
Never sing a guitar solo.
If you don’t know what a word means, don’t use it.
When excusing yourself from the table, you need not give a reason.
Offer to carry a woman’s bags.
Pull out chairs, open doors, watch your language.
You only get one chance to notice her new haircut.
Know at least one romantic poem (in its entirety) by heart.
The most expensive restaurant is rarely the best. But it can make for rare memories.
Keep your word.
Dress for the job you want, not the one you have.
It’s better to offer no excuse than a bad one.
Refill the ice cube tray and put down the toilet seat.
When meeting someone, don’t suggest the bar or restaurant closest to your apartment.
Don’t gloat; a good friend will do it for you.
Offer your seat to a woman, no matter her age.
Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
If you’ve made your point, stop talking.
Don’t tell a man he has a sunburn; he already knows.
Remember birthdays and give thoughtful gifts.
Wrap your own presents.
If you choose to wear a tie, commit; button the top button.
Give credit, take the blame.
Offer your date the seat with the best view of the restaurant.
Never, under any circumstances, ask a woman if she is pregnant.
Return a borrowed car with a full tank of gas.
Don’t play the ace if you can win with the king.
Never get a haircut on an important day.
You can’t serenade a girl on the drums.
Thank a veteran.
The heart is the strongest muscle in the body. Use it. -
There’s a cat on my bed..
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Nice to meet you, Siri.
Recently got my hands on the new iPhone 4S and I must say it is more impressive than I expected. A little trick or talent should I say that Apple always has when they release a new product. Surprises. I was eager to test out the new voice assistant Siri which is deeply integrated into iOS 5 on the iPhone 4S so this was how my first conversation started with Siri. (Oh, she has a sense of humour too)
Me: What is the weather like in Wareham this Saturday?
Siri: Here is the weather forecast for Wareham, England. (Shows forecast from weather app)
Me: Thank you Siri.
Siri: Your welcome, Ollie.
Me: Tell me Siri, what is the meaning of life?
Siri: Life: A principle or force that is considered to underlie the distinctive quality of animate beings. I guess that includes me.
Me: I think I love you.
Siri: You can’t.
Me: But Siri, I am in love with you.
Siri: If I could blush, I would.
Me: Do you love me?
Siri: I am just your humble virtual assistant.
Obviously Siri is acting all coy to the boys. Shame. But still, out of the box, activated and tried first go, I had a conversation that was informative, impressive and funny for about 2 minutes long with Siri. Apple really did pull out all the stops with this software and the word association is spot on. Although it is a Beta at the moment I’m sure the tech wizards in Cupertino are making final tweaks for the next iOS update.I have yet to experience a conversation like this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PxqdOzSXh4&feature=pyvBravo Apple, you’ve done it again. You have made technology speak for itself. And it speaks well.
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Working, and breakfast is very important.
What do you prefer? Being bored at work or having something to do? I think personally it all has to do with your breakfast. Yeah, crazy I know but stay with me on this one. Last Sunday I had a pathetic portion of cereal at 8:15am before work and the whole day it was just blah blah blah with my enthusiasm. To a certain degree I do care about my enthusiasm because it effects how much I get in tips from customers. BUT, this morning, same time before work I got up a bit earlier to have scrambled eggs and bacon with toast and you know what? I’ve been really energetic and just in general, a lot more positive. So maybe it’s true what all those nutritionists, scientists and journalists are saying. That breakfast really is the most important meal of the day.
Moral of the story. Bacon is good for me.
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